By Chantal Bashal
The Bible records the creation of marriage in Genesis 2:23–24:
“The man said, ‘This is now bone of my bones and flesh of my flesh; she shall be called “woman,” for she was taken out of man.’ For this reason, a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and they will become one flesh.”
God created man and then made woman to complement him. In the Bible marriage is God’s “fix” for the fact that “it is not good for the man to be alone” (Genesis 2:18).
As the Bible describes the first marriage, it uses the word helper to identify Eve (Genesis 2:20).
To “help,” in this context means “to surround, to protect or aid.”
God created Eve to come alongside Adam as his “other half,” to be his aide and his helper. The Bible says that marriage causes a man and woman to become “one flesh.” This oneness is manifested most fully in the physical union of sexual intimacy.
The New Testament adds a warning regarding this oneness: “So they are no longer two, but one. Therefore, what God has joined together, let man not separate” (Matthew 19:6).
Several of Paul’s epistles refer to marriage and how believers are to operate within the marriage relationship. One such passage is Ephesians 5:22–33. Studying this passage provides some key truths concerning what the Bible says marriage should be.
The Bible, in Ephesians 5, says a successful Biblical marriage involves both the husband and the wife fulfilling certain roles:
“Wives, submit to your husbands as to the Lord. For the husband is the head of the wife as Christ is the head of the church, his body, of which he is the Savior” (Ephesians 5:22–23).
“Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her” (Ephesians 5:25). “In this same way, husbands ought to love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself. After all, no one ever hated his own body, but he feeds and cares for it, just as Christ does the church” (Ephesians 5:28–29). “For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh” (Ephesians 5:31).
When a believing husband and wife institute God’s principles of marriage in the Bible, a solid, healthy marriage results. A Biblically based marriage keeps Christ as the head of the man and the wife together. The Biblical concept of marriage involves a oneness between a husband and wife that pictures the oneness of Christ with His church.
And that is what should be talked about in the so-called bridal showers. Other kinds of talk are wrong and selfish.
Talking about bridal showers, many girls or brides-to-be have been taught different things by the married women, about the experience they have had about marriage.
This has brought about failures in their marriage, because they often talk from their bad experience. For example, some myths are communicated during bridal showers like, warning and discouraging the bride-to-be.
Some of those myths are: “Umugabo ni umwana w’undi,” or “Abagabo ni ibirura.” A man should be treated like a baby. The way to a man’s heart is through his stomach. A man will most likely cheat on you; you just have to be patient and so on.
These are just some of the many common phrases used in modern day bridal showers that have sparked a controversial topic on whether bridal showers are still relevant in today’s society or not.
Those kinds of myths and phrases make the bride to think that she’s going to a hell of life or she’s going to a battlefield.
It makes her think that she cannot fully trust her spouse, and that she needs to stay alert at any time, because things may go wrong.
I am not talking about this to tell you not to plan for a bridal shower, or not to attend them; but I want to tell you that the best bridal shower is your Bible, as we have seen earlier above.
Other experiences you will be told will only scare you but not change you. Anyway, do you know that what worked for them may not work for you?
Do you know that men are different? You can’t copy what they told you in the bridal showers and hope it’s going to work for you. Their experience may not be similar as yours. And that’s the reason why Paul never told you to imitate anyone except God (Ephesians 5:1).